The Dark Tower

I just finished book seven of The Dark Tower series this afternoon (the last book), and I am here to tell you that I officially hate Stephen King. HATE HIM! Hate him with a passion that I had previously reserved only for Shawn Hannity, Michael Savage, Evangelicals, Jack Thompson, and Fear Factor.

I don't want to ruin the books for anyone else, but let me just say that if you are reading a Stephen King book and he tells you that the important point of the story is over and you want to stop reading even though there are only 5 pages left, that the point of a story is the journey, not the ending, blah, blah, blah, you should put the book down and step away from it slowly. In fact, tear those last five pages out and burn them so it will no longer be able to tempt you to just read them. Because otherwise you are going to finish that last page and do what I did:

Scream at the top of your lungs, "NOOOOOOOO!!! YOU CANNOT FUCKING END IT THAT WAY!!!!!! FUCK YOU STEPHEN KING!!!"

And then you will hear a voice that I can only assume is Stephen King's whispering in your ear saying, "See? I told you so."

Another Classic Quote

Another soon to be classic quote from OverheadInTheOffice:

"I am a guacamole of knowledge into which you may dip the nacho of need."

Hooray!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
Today is Eric's 27th birthday! I hope that you have a great day today Eric! I love you!

9 Years

I know it is wrong to kiss and tell, but it was 9 years ago today that Sue and I had our first kiss at the little waterfall on the Red Cedar River just south of the Administration building on the Michigan State University campus.

Just wanted to tell her in a public forum that I was so glad she said "yes" to both my first question there ("Would it be alright if I kissed you?") and my second question exactly 3 years later ("Will you marry me?").

Girls of Geek

Just because R asked for it:

http://www.girlsofgeekdom.com/index.php

Not sure I believe these girls are all geeks, but it is nice to dream. And the calendar might be a nice present for that single geek you know.

Programmer Truisms

From the Un-Dynamics of Software Development

1. It is still the Wild, Wild West out here and anything goes.


2. You are the best programmer.


3. Many programmers are intellectual bullies and egomaniacs.


4. The mean time between the time you start speaking and someone flipping the bozo bit (the bit that a programmer flips in their head to stop listening to someone they feel is an idiot) on you is ten seconds.


5. When someone says the schedule is going to be missed, they are never lying.


6. Change is a constant, but people will seldom thank you for changing their code.


7. A lot of bad software is being written by people who don't read.


8. People believe too much of what they read.


9. Authors are not smarter than the rest of us; they just read more.


10. Managers should not make technical decisions, but do.


11. If a manager says I am not technical, be prepared to spend a lot of time explaining things to them so they can make decisions they shouldn't be making.


12. Managers hire experts and ignore them all the time.


13. Messengers get shot more often than not.


14. Leaders have to lead; sometimes you will look behind you and find that someone is actually following.


15. Programmers hate to read another programmer's code; if they volunteer to review your code, it is not to do you a favor.


16. There really are programmers ten times faster than everyone else.


17. Every man is in some way my superior, as long as he doesn't keep reminding me.


18. Programmers are emotionally attached to their code, but never say this out loud.


19. Everyone talks about constructive tension but doesn't want you disagreeing with them.


20. Benevolent dictators build the best software.


21. Decisions are, more often than not, emotional.

Tucson Hiking

I finally got my pictures developed from my hiking adventure to Tucson. This
is the best one of the bunch:

If you look closely, you might even notice that I was in the picture. Now, I know what you are thinking. You're thinking, "That Eric is REALLY short". Either that or you are thinking, "That is one big cactus". The second thought is correct. For those who thought the first thought...well...you're an idiot and I'm sorry.

Here another:

That there sure is one giant cactus I'm standing next to at the start of the trail.

<Austin Powers voice>Does that make you horny baby?</Austin Powers voice>

Sexiest woman alive?!?! C'mon!

Um, I am not sure who voted but Esquire magazine named Jessica Biel the "Sexiest woman alive." Eric and I agree that someone was drunk and high when they thought of this or else the magazine was turned down by the real sexy women. I would have to say that Angelina Jolie or Jennifer Garner (pre-pregnancy that is) are the sexiest women alive. If I were a lesbian or bi, I would love to get some of the Angelina action... ;) Those big tasty lips, and that long hair, not to mention the buliging bust... but, I digress ( you are welcome Eric). We do not think Jessica Biel is that hot. She has no boobs! There are many other women that are hotter. I guess we think women are sexy if they are strong, muscular, have big boobs (natural, none of that fake crap that never moves, EWWW) and beautiful. Jessica Simpson, Brittany Spears, Catherine Zeta Jones, Eliza Dushku, etc. What about these Jay and Silent Bob strike back ladies?

Sick Dog

[Currently listening to: Green Day - American Idiot]

Poor Bob. Our dog has some sort of skin bacterial infection that makes him scratch and bite at his skin almost constantly. It is so bad that he has started biting out chunks of hair from his front paws. It makes him look like the undead, as the following picture clearly shows:

On the plus side, Bob spaced out on Benadryl is pretty funny to watch.

Some Trance Links

[Currently listening to: Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral]

Thanks to my pal Sebastian (via Paul. Got to give props for the intro), I've discovered several new sites for downloading some really good hard trance. This makes me a happy developer at work and a happy gamer at home (I tend to kill the background music for most games and pump in whatever trance I'm listening to instead. It makes WoW or Civilizations III a whole new game:) ). Check out:

http://www.tranceaddict.com/livesets.shtml - I especially like the first Paul Van Dyke set on this page.

http://edmm.ca/ - Thanks to Paul and Sebastian, I'm a huge fan of the sets by "Preacher" on this site. They are really good stuff.

http://www.ladybass.net/ - A female DJ from Toronto that I really dig. I don't remember where I found her, which seems odd. Her music is very hard trance/jungle. Actually, if you have ever seen that Strong Bad email on techno, it describes pretty much what her music sounds like (including the obligatory old movie quotes).

http://www.djbolivia.ca/ - One of my co-workers swears by this guy as "software developer friendly" trance. His sets have names like "memory leak" and "exception handler". Not my sound, but whatever.

What's Wrong with these people?

Alabama State Sen. Hank Erwin, R-Montevallo, recently called Hurricane Katrina a punishment from God, saying New Orleans and the Mississippi Gulf Coast "have always been known for gambling, sin and wickedness. It is the kind of behavior that ultimately brings the judgment of God."

So the damage to your fine state of Alabama means what exactly? How about the thousands of people who live in that area but don't support gambling, sin, and wickedness? How about that other hurricane that hit the oh so red state of Texas the other day? Apparently God's aim sucks. Look, if God wanted to punish the gay folks, he would just blast them with a lightening bolt or cause all of their penises to drop off. This "natural disasters as an act of God" horse shit make me think we are still living in a time when we thought lightning was thrown by Zeus from a mountain. Stop being such pretentious ass holes and assuming that you know the will of God.

Of course, its an issue that all Christians have trouble with. How do you reconcile the idea that God is all knowing, all powerful, and loves everyone with any natural disaster? Surely God could have built a world where thousands don't die for no reason greater than warm water in a spin cycle. Its a difficult question. True evil is something that you can perhaps explain as human nature running against God will, but how does one justify natural disasters?

Nothing to Write About

MSU LOST to UofM! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I knew that the whole "our defense sucks but we run up more points that you" stategy was going to fail sooner or later.

I just noticed it has been more than week since our last post, and I still don't really have anything to talk about. I've been insanely busy at work the last couple of days trying to teach our customer how to use our code base so that they can get rid of us without actually telling them how to use our code base. Its stressful and annoying and I hate it. But since I write almost all of my blogs while I am at work reading the news, it effects my output.

Thank God its Friday

I was surfing around at work doing anything but actual work when I ran across the following from Overheard in the Office:

"It's about time to not come to work for a couple of days."

Ramen sister. Ramen.

Today has been just one of those days. First, its casual Friday for everyone but me. Why just me you say? Because I had to deliver our program's monthly review today to our Major, which means dressing in above average business casual. Any day that I am denied dressing like a slacker pisses me off right off the bat. Second, I did not know that I would be delivering said presentation until I got to work this morning, which meant I had to drive back home, change into something presentable, then drive back to work. With my Jeep that mean about $3:). Third, said meeting was 2 hours long of which I spoke for about 10 minutes. The rest was spent spinning my ID badge in various yo-yo like manners and trying my best not to think of anyone naked (engineers...<shudder>)

That's combined to put me in a sour mode that makes work rough. Bah. Just keep telling yourself, "One more hour and I am out of here...59 minutes 50 seconds and I am out of here...".

Pastafarians

Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

OK, I'm clearly slipping to have missed such a hilarious parody on the internet for so long. The first time Sue and I read the description of this yesterday we laughed so hard that we cried a little.

Anyways, for those who don't want to go through the trouble of reading the entire site, I'll sum up. In response to the Kanas City school board allowing intelligent Design, a physics student made up his own religion and demanded that Kansas City school board also teach this system. The main tenets are a follows:

• The Universe was created by an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster. All evidence pointing towards evolution was intentionally planted by this being.


• According to the pastafarians, the monster created the world starting with a mountain, trees and a midget and continues to guide human affairs with his "noodly appendage." Heaven is depicted as having a stripper factory and a beer volcano.






• They refuse to use the word "evolution". Instead, they say things like "logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence".


• Their prayers to "Him" are typically ended by "Ramen", instead of "Amen". For example, one of their chants is: "Flying Spaghetti Monster, Pie Saucus Domine, Ramen"


• They believe it is disrespectful to teach beliefs in Flying Spaghetti Monsterism without wearing His chosen outfit, which of course is full pirate regalia


• Global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct consequence of the decline in numbers of pirates since the 1800s. The graph below showing the inverse correlation between the pirates and global temperatures proves it!

Napolean Gates

Bill Gates Goes to College

The video is a litte grainy and the sound sucks in places since it is a hand held video taping a projector at Microsoft's developer conference, but it is hilarious if you like Napolean Dynamite.

Slurpee turns 40

Salon.com: The Slurpee at 40

Why must I read articles like this when I am living 300 miles from the nearest 7-11?!?!? Why God! Why?!?! How I miss that rush of completely empty sugar calories, caffeine, brain freeze that only a Coke slurpee can deliver...

According to the article, "Here in the United States the drink is most beloved in Detroit...". Wikipedia also points out that more Slurpees are consumed per year in Detroit then anywhere else in the USA. I think both of these articles must have been based on older data. I'd be willing to wager there was a significant drop in total consumption in that region right around the time Sue and I left:)

University Research Into Stupidity

Backpack designed to generate power from walking

I happen to see this article on Yahoo News about this backpack that researchers at the University of Pennsylvania that can generate electricity just from the act of walking with it. Cool I thought. I could use something like that for my IPod, or my cell phone at just the right moment. But then I got to this:

"Humping along just under 85 pounds (38 kg) of weight in the backpack can produce up to 7 watts of electricity"

85 pounds? 85 POUNDS? Are you kidding? Do you know how many batteries I can carry around and still be under 85 pounds? What ivory tower dumb ass thought this one up? Oh right...University of Pennsylvania ivory tower dumb asses.

Don't forget about the pets.

I love pets! I love my dogs. They are like family. Katrina was a horrific storm and it caused a lot of physical and emotional pain. The humans that stayed down there were just plain stupid. They should have all left. They had four days to get the hell out of dodge. I feel for the pets. They had no choice. They were abandoned and betrayed. Their owners stayed during the hurricane and were able to leave after, if they survived, but the government did not let anyone take pets with them on buses to leave the area. So after the hurricane there were poor, innocent dogs just wandering the disgusting waters of New Orleans looking for a familiar face or for a meal. Pets were drowning in the water because they could not make it to a safe area or they were trapped in homes or tied up by chains. It angers me and it saddens me. All those pets and animals did not need to suffer in this way. The Humane Society is trying it's best to find and rescue as many abandoned pets and animals that they can. Please donate if you can. I commend the Humane society for all of it's work. Adopt a pet if you can to help save some of these animals that need a home and want nothing more than a chance at life and love. I would adopt more dogs if Eric would let me. I think everyone's life would be better with a pet. They love unconditionally and they make you smile at least 1000 times a day.

Labor Day is Confusing

Every year I have the exact same thought on Labor Day:

This is supposed to be the day that we celebrate the labor of all the hard working individuals of this country. How exactly are we "celebrating" labor by all sleeping in and having the day off? :)

We are all 3 days away from total starvation

Is anyone else but me severely traumatized by the whole situation in New Orleans? For the love of God. 3 days. Apparently all it takes is three days without power and a shower and all of society will collapse. It is like we are watching the Lord of the Flies played out in real life. All I can hope is that it is specific to New Orleans. I mean, they lost power in New York and Michigan for up to a week last year and those folks did not riot, loot, or shoot at people who were attempting to rescue them.

What's worse is I can almost understand it: I had to fight the urge to horde gasoline yesterday. Looking at prices of gas on the way home ($3.25 a gallon was not uncommon in Huntsville), I'm not sure fighting that urge was the best idea. The only thing that stopped me is knowing that a rush for gas will only make a gas supply crunch worst. The reality is that gas stations do not have enough gas for everyone to fill up at the same time even when there is no crimp in the supply. That's just not the way the system works.

And folks I work with are starting to get on my nerves. I swear if one more person comes into my office and breaks my concentration in order to tell me something else horrible that happened in New Orleans, I am just going to have beat them to death with my computer speakers.

We're Fine

Just in case any of the out of state readers of this blog are wondering about the welfare of your favorite bloggers in the wake of the current hurricane mania, Sue and I are fine. We were ready to hunker down on Monday night with new surge protectors, batteries, radios, blankets, candles, and a bunch of interior walls to entertain us, but in the end nothing much happened and we slept in our beds all through the night. For those folks who's Alabama geography is a little rusty, Huntsville is roughly as far north in Alabama as you can get and still legally sleep with your sister;) So all we had to contend with was some wind and some rain. We didn't even lose power in the end (which is incredible because I swear we lose power in my neighborhood every time a cow pees in the wrong direction).

And I thought I was Geeky

I thought I knew the definition of geeky, but I had no idea until I saw this video today that a couple of Microsoft interns made:

http://www.ifilm.com/ifilmdetail/2677918 (It's even safe for viewing at work)

I bow to the superior geek-ness of these folks.

Irony in Best Buy

Sue and I were perusing the computer game selves of the local Best But today, when I notice the box for the new NHL 2005. Yeah... How do you have a new game when there wasn't a season? I didn't read the back of the box, but I imagine the text was something like the follow:

Enter the exciting world of pro sport contact negotiations. Play as either the greedy team owners, or the greedy NHL players in a exciting, high stake game of chicken. Can you save the 2005 hockey season from being cancelled? Can you understand the complexities of salary caps, revenue sharing, and the economics of a sport with too many teams and not enough money?

Features include:

* Listen in to AM sport programs blather on for hours about why each side's demands are insane

* Visit the mansions of both players or owners to try and understand why each side demands so much of the pie.

* Sit through 100% realistic all night negotiations where both sides will agree to everything except the things they disagreed about in the last meeting.

NHL 2005: not letting a hockey strike ruin our chance to sell basically the same game we released last year.

Now these are cars!

I saw this article and had to put up my two sense. Call me what you want, but I must say that I do not get the choices the youth of today pick for "cool"cars. To me they are ugly. When people pimp out the Ford Focus, Neon, some hatchback (basically any car on the game Need for Speed) or just buy a Mazda, Mitsibushi or Toyota sports car I don't get it. I really do not get the new convertible version of the PT Cruiser. We saw one the other day and they suck. I also do not get the color choices. Cars should come in only red, black, or blue. I don't get why a hetero man would get a purple or yellow car. That is just not right.

I love going to the car shows and seeing all of the old muscle cars. Now I have always been a lover of cars and when I see the brand new Mustang, I just want to run up to it and roll all over it... I druel just thinking about it. I love the look, the horsepower and the history behind it. Just thinking about 300 horsepower makes me hot. It is the king of cool cars and has been for a long time. The model just before the most recent upgrade of the mustang was pretty ugly so I am glad they went back to the basic look of the old car! I also love the older versions of the cars. I had an ex that I stayed with a little longer because he and his dad were rebuilding old GTO's. They were hot! The guy became annoying but I sure loved his car ;) What can I say, I was only 16? He also liked my car. My first car was an '83 Ford Thunderbird. It had 3.8L V6 engine (druel) and I loved it. I lived out on country roads so at 2 in the morning I would get that baby up to 120 or 130. What can I say, I was a wild child ;) All the guys would fix it for free because they just loved the car. I did not mind. It gave me a reason to talk to the hottest guy in school who had the same car. That car lasted me a long time. Ahh the memories. My best friend and I would kidnap her boyfriend, drive to Canada at midnight, get drunk (drinking age is 19 in Canada), sober up in Tim Horton's and come back the next morning. We went to Canada a lot along with other road trips.

Where did that tradition go? The hot looking muscle cars are a great american custom that the Asian market really has not grasped. Those ugly handle looking spoilers they put on their sports cars. Ugh!

I also do not get how a person can buy a new mustang, corvette, or GTO and drive it like a pussy. I will go on the freeway and they are going 5-15 under the speed limit. WTF? I do not like slow drivers to begin with but if you own a muscle car and you are driving slow, then you need to buy a new car...

Caffeine Overdose is the same as Sex

So I was reading a FAQ on Caffeine this morning when I came across this description for the effects of Caffeine overdose.

Caffeine-Induced Organic Mental Disorder (Caffeine Intoxication or Overdose)

1) Recent consumption of caffeine, usually in excess of 250 mg.
2) At least five of the following signs:

• restlessness


• nervousness


• excitement


• insomnia


• flushed face


• diuresis


• gastrointestinal disturbance


• muscle twitching


• rambling flow of thought and speech


• tachycardia or cardiac arrhythmia


• periods of inexhaustibility


• psychomotor agitation
  

3) Not due to any physical or other mental disorder, such as an Anxiety Disorder.

My very first thought is that Sex and a Caffeine overdose are basically the same. Let run the list:

• restlessness - Clearly I don't want to sleep during sex.


• nervousness - early on, sure. I'm nervous I am going to fuck it up and not get sex.


• excitement - Hells ya!


• insomnia - See restlessness


• flushed face - If we are doing it right:)


• diuresis - well, ok, maybe not this one. Although don't you find you always have to pee at the worst possible moments?


• gastrointestinal disturbance - all that shaking CAN make you feel a little car sick at times.


• muscle twitching - Do I even need to say anything here?


• rambling flow of thought and speech - Pretty much all I am capable of is grunting and the occasional epitaph spoken in happiness.


• tachycardia or cardiac arrhythmia - All that pumping is hard!:)


• periods of inexhaustibility - F#$k ya. Just ask Sue.


• psychomotor agitation - Everyone know that I shake when I am happy:)
  

Guess you know what this means. Time to get an espresso machine!

Look, it's a BatHook!

New machine allows soldiers to hurdle buildings.

At long last, my dream of owning some of the coolest equipment that Batman had can finally be lived out. According to this article, the Pentagon has procurded a new handheld system that can "raise or lower a load of up to 145 kg (320 lb) at the rate of one meter (yard) per second...the operator would shoot a rope attached to a grappling hook to the top of the building and then attach the rope to a harness-like device which hauls them up."

And they have a civilian version in the works.

America: Fuck Ya.

Talk Nerdy to Me

This blog is a co-production of Eric and Sue.

Since being geek has become so cool (metrosexuals are SOOOO 2004), Sue and I have created a list of 0x10 things for you non-techie women to say to your geek in bed:

1) These 6" heels add +15 to my stamina
2) Would you like to touch my software?
3) Can I play with your hard drive?
4) Two words: golden bikini
5) Is that a light saber in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
6) I dance naked in the auction house of WoW.
7) Put Yoda back in my hut.
8) Boldly go where no man has gone before.
9) DING! (This one is for R)
A) If you want me, come a claim me!
B) <as she gazes at your penis> my precious...
C) I love to role play.
D) Be gentle. I'm a n00b.
E) PWN ME! OH GOD PWN ME!

Puppies rule!

Just to put up a new blog, here are some new pics of Bob and Bella. Eric and I just have not come up with anything interesting to say lately ;)

Bella loves to play ball. She goes nuts for the ball she is holding. How cute...

And beware of Darth Bob...Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun!

The words are like poetry...

I am a fan of poetry, ecspecially musical poetry. I just love when songs have lyrics that are poetic and actually have meaning. I love music because of the words and the spirit and the soul that the music can pass onto the listener. This is why I love DMB and Evanescence. One of my current faves is Kelly Clarkston. Her first cds were whatever the idol people made her do and this current one just seems like the music she wants to do. I love the mix of pop and punk, but more importantly the words in some of her songs. In her words: "I've had some pretty crappy people and things happen to me, but I've learned something from each one of those crappy things." One song in particular really spoke to me and I can relate to it's words:

Because Of You

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break, the way you did, you fell so hard
I’ve learned the hard way to never let it get that far

(chorus)
Because of you
I never strayed to far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt
Because of you I find it hard to find it hard to trust, not only me,
but everyone around me, Because of you, I am afraid

I lose my way, and its not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry, because I know that’s weakness in your eyes
I’m forced to fake a smile, a laugh, every day of my life
My heart can’t possibly break, when it wasn’t even whole to start with

(chorus)

I watched you die, I heard you cry, every night in your sleep.
I was so young, you should have known better than to lean on me.
You never thought of anyone else you just saw your pain.
And now I cry in the middle of the night, doin the same damn thing

(chorus, but slightly different)
Because of you I never strayed to far from the sidewalk
Because of you I learned to play on the safe side so I don’t get hurt
Because of you I try my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you I don’t know how to let anyone else in

Because of you I’m ashamed of my life, because its empty
Because of you, I am afraid

Because of you…

Because of you…

In her words on her website: "I've had some pretty crappy people and things happen to me, but I've learned something from each one of those crappy things."

Hey, these are Southwestern Toppings!!!

I'm in Tucson on TDY for the next couple of days working on yet another helicopter loader. I give Tucson credit: this place is really beautiful. It's one of the few times I wish I had a small camera phone or something like that to take pictures with. Even the view out of my room is nice. Mountains and scrub and empty land as far as the eye can see. It's even better than Phoenix, at least the parts of Phoenix I am used to (too much smog there hides some of the really great views).

It is so empty that the Pentagon parks all the moth balled aircraft of the Air Force and Navy at an air base here. I actually went and visited it today for kicks. It's surreal. You almost get that weird feeling you get whenever you enter a graveyard. Here's a picture I found that does it pretty good justice:

Must be a Slow news day

You know it is a slow news day when Bushes hire first woman as White House head chef is a AP headline... Sigh...

I don't care. I DON'T CARE! Seriously, this is the sort of headline I would expect the Onion to post. What's next? "President names first gay hispanic as the janitor of the White House"?

Ramblings of Eric: Part 7 - Current Beliefs

Now that I have waited long enough to ensure that you have all forgotten the contents of my last rambling post, it's time to delve into some REALLY personal stuff. First up: disclaimers.

- The views in this blog are mine. They don't necessarily reflect what Sue or anyone else for that matter believes. They are mine and mine alone.

- I'm not trying to convince anyone that my beliefs are right. That would be a ridiculous waste of all our times.

- If you are just going to post some sort of comment about how my beliefs are wrong because such and such book says so, save us all some time, go away, and get a life while you are at it.

OK, lets start with the big thing right up front: I do think there is some higher power. Some thing beyond just you and me. Don't ask me who or what or where. Just...some thing. But that is about as far as I am willing to commit to right now. I often wonder what it must be like to be so FUCKING sure that your religion is right. My brother (and my parents and grandparents ) would tell you that they are Missouri Synod Lutheran (what I grew up with). Not just Christian. Not even just "Lutheran". I can't figure out whether the Hindus or Buddhists or the whatever have it right, and yet my family members are 100% sure that their particular little sect has it 100% correct. It just pisses me off. I WANT to be that sure. It would so much easier to not question it. Just go with the flow.

But I can't. I just can't anymore. I've learned too much. I've seen too much history of people doing horrible, unspeakable things in the name of religion to be able to just blindly say that the Bible (or whatever spiritual text you are interested in) is 100% accurate. Even my brother would admit that the earliest copy we have is at least 200 AD or so.

How ARE they so sure? What I hate even more than the fact that they (not just my family. I mean the conservative right in general) are so sure is that they confuse my unwillingness to commit to their particular belief to be the equivalent of me saying that they are wrong. I'm not saying they are wrong. If you believe in the Christian God, I 100% support your right and your desire to do so. Just don't make me commit to it. I'm not there. I'm not ready. I've been there, seen it, and said to myself that I'm not sure. There it is again. That FUCKING confusion that permeates everything about this topic.

I've rambled enough for now. I actually feel worse after spilling this one out. Less sure of myself. Fuck it. I'm going to bed.

I want to blog...

Sue has been mad crazy with posting, and I am feeling left out. So I thought I would write about...some thing. Sadly, I got nothing today. No news to mock. No movies that I have seen that I would recommend. Nothing.

Anyone have any ideas for posts? I've got 42 cents that I will share with someone who comes up with something for me to blog about (why 42? Because I thought, (1) no one would help me for a measly 41 cents, and (2) its the secret to the life, the universe, and everything).

Eric's sugar daddy days are numbered...

I am employed!! I start at the end of August! I accepted a position at the big hospital down here (Huntsville people know what I mean) in the Respiratory unit. It is a good place to get my start and I know that the doctors are nice and laid back. It makes me less nervous! Just wanted to let everyone know!

Another couple off the market

Congratulations Paul and Sue!!

Eric and I are home again after flying off to NY last Wednesday for the SuePaul wedding extravaganza! We had tons of fun and we are so glad that we were able to share that special day with two of our greatest friends. Their ceremony was unique and very special and I enjoyed it immensely. It is nice to see a wedding that is different from all of the usual boring stuff. Their ceremony really showed the love they shared ;)

Eric and I are very tired since our flights were severely screwed up (damn Atlanta airport!) and we did not get back to our house until 1:30 am this morning. Eric had work and I had an interview so we had to wake up early this morning. After already being sleep deprived due to tons of partying this weekend, this morning was rough. I hate Delta airlines since they use Atlanta airport as their hub and I am going to try really hard to avoid them from now on. Every flight I have gone on or that my family has gone on has been delayed in Atlanta airport. They suck at it! UGH! Anywho, I think a nap is calling and my brain is not ready to think and write any more!

As a side note, I finished the 6th Harry Potter book during our flights this weekend and if any of you out there have done the same email or call me since I need to discuss the end of this book with someone!!! What a suprise and emotional ending!! I will not spoil the end to anyone so call me if you finished it!!

Love and Marriage

In honor of two of our good friends upcoming marriage this Friday, we will post some song lyrics, poems and what not, related to love. The first is Bryan Adams, "Have you ever really loved a woman?" I love the words to this song. I just got his best of cd and I am not afraid to say that I love Bryan Adams! I just wish that love songs were not "out" in this day and age...

Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman? Bryan Adams

To really love a womanTo understand her - you gotta know her deep inside
Hear every thought - see every dream
N' give her wings - when she wants to fly
Then when you find yourself lyin' helpless in her arms
Ya know ya really love a woman
When you love a woman you tell her
that she's really wanted
When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one
Cuz she needs somebody to tell her that it's gonna last forever
So tell me have you ever really - really really ever loved a woman?
To really love a woman
Let her hold you -
til ya know how she needs to be touched
You've gotta breathe her - really taste her
Til you can feel her in your blood
N' when you can see your unborn children in her eyes
Ya know ya really love a woman
When you love a woman you tell her
that she's really wanted
When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one
Cuz she needs somebody to tell her
that you'll always be together
So tell me have you ever really -
really really ever loved a woman?
You got to give her some faith - hold her tight
A little tenderness - gotta treat her right
She will be there for you, takin' good care of you
Ya really gotta love your woman...
Then when you find yourself lyin' helpless in her arms
Ya know ya really love a woman
When you love a woman you tell her
that she's really wanted
When you love a woman you tell her that she's the one
Cuz she needs somebody to tell herthat it's gonna last forever
So tell me have you ever really -
really really ever loved a woman?
Just tell me have you ever really,
really, really, ever loved a woman?
Just tell me have you ever really,
really, really, ever loved a woman?

Great movie

I had to blog about the movie "Must love dogs". Eric and I went to see it this past weekend and it was great. It has Diane Lane and John Cusak as the lead characters. It was a very funny movie that makes fun of the current fad of online dating. John Cusak is funny as always in this movie and so is Diane Lane. Diane Lane plays a divorced women who is trying to get into the dating game again and John Cusak plays a divorced man that answers her online ad. I do not think Diane Lane would really have any trouble finding a date since she is gorgeous.


I was sad to see that the reviewers did not give it a good movie review, but I never listen to them anyway. This really was a great movie and I hope you get a chance to see it.

Congratulations Are In Order

Susanne Marie Wilson is now offically licenced to practice nursing in the state of Alabama:) She finally got the results of her licencing exam today, and although I know she would be too modest to post on the blog about how very proud she is of herself, I wanted to go on public record and tell everyone that I am VERY VERY proud of her. Way to go Sue! It's time to celebrate!

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to Sue.

Let the spankings commence! (27 this year)

Ramblings of Eric: Part 6 - Early Teachings

So it's not late at night and I haven't had a blowjob today (damn it), but I'm still going to pour some ramblings out of my head. Just as fair warning: There is nothing humorous in this post. I'm not kidding. If you are in a particularly good mood, wander away and read it later. It's actually just boring (but important) memories from my childhood. It will (hopefully) lead into another post I am writing about my current beliefs in a higher being(s). You have been warned.

You would not know it today, but I was raised in a fairly conservative and religious household. My mother and my brother regularly attended church. I went to Sunday School from the age of 5 until 6^th grade, got confirmed (which was a very big deal for my family. At least as big as when I graduated high school), then continued going to church pretty religiously (pun intended) until I went off to college. I attended Church lock-ins and went to church camp (which I can attest is nothing like band camp) twice as a kid. My middle brother Steve went to college at a private Lutheran college and studied to be a pastor for quite a while (he now works as the youth leader for a larger church in Ohio).

The funny thing about Sunday school is that I still remember some very odd things about the people and events that surrounded that part of my life. I remember memorizing the ten commandments around 2^nd or 3^rd grade. There is no way I understood what adultery was at the age of 9, but I could recite the 7^th commandment then without real thought. I noticed this latter on in life when I went to church also. Most of time, I was repeating things like the Lord's Prayer without even thinking about the words that I was reciting.

My point is that I was taught this stuff pretty early on and that I more or less accepted it until around my freshman year in college. I say more or less because I had a year or so in sophomore year of high school where I was really not so sure anymore. I just started delving into my ideas about free will, and I was having real trouble combining the Christian message that God is omnipotent with the idea that I have real choices. What really set me off on this little rebellion was oddly enough a trip with my church group to work with Habitat for Humanity.

The group we worked with had two type of volunteers. Temporary volunteers like me and my group came up for a week of work. We were lead by longer term volunteers that worked for an entire summer. Anyways, one of these longer term volunteers turned out to be gay (dun dun dun!) Not flaming homosexual; it's not like he told anyone explicitly, but somehow my youth leader guessed at it. I came upon them having a somewhat heated but muted argument. I remember asking her what that was about. I've never forgotten my youth leader telling me that despite his obvious acceptance of God and all the good work he was doing, he was not going to heaven because of his "decision" to be gay.

That has always stuck with me. Even at 15, I knew that something about that statement did not gel with my idea of what it took to get into heaven. But after a few months of thinking about all of these issues, I just sort of fell back into the fold (although even here I was defending evolution and questioning the whole God knows everything tenets).

That's just one of my more pronouced memories. Another one I remember quite vividly was at a local camp doing our annual youth planning retreat with my then soon to be girlfriend Melony. She had just started coming to our church and I had met her through a mutual friend. I was up one night very late with her and my youth leader and we were talking about her conversion. I remember her crying because she had just realized that the fact her conversion saving her and allowing her into heaven meant that her grandmother, who was not a Christian, would not be there when she eventually died. This is the part I will never forget: My youth leader telling her that that was correct without any real compassion. Me, I was really torn up for this girl and I remember being really angry with God for putting her through this sort of thing. It was an issue that I had never considered because both my grandparents and family were religious as far back as I can remember.

Then of course there was the fact that the pastor who confirmed me was thrown out shortly after I left for college. Apparently he had been giving comfort to some of the ladies of the congregation in the biblical sense of that term. If that wasn't bad enough, he was also married at the time...whoops.

There are probably 100 other memories I could delve into, but these are the ones that really stick to me. This post is already way to long. If you even made it this far, you are probably angry about the fact that you drove all this way for absolutely no point. But I promise I have another post coming about what I believe now about all this reglious stuff. This one is mostly back story.

Are So! Are Not!

Why are the Republicans and Democrats so insanely polorized? I swear that if the Turing test (a test devised by Alan Turing to show if a computer was really conscious) was create a program that could fool people into think it was a national party spokeperson, I could win that contest given a week of work and a thesaurus. All I would have to do is feed it whatever the pundit/spokeperson A for the other party said and have it randomly spit out:

1. person A's idea will doom this country
2. person A is an extremist/communist (depending the person A's party)
3. person A is lying

All I would need is 10 or so synonyms for lying, and we could put him up on CNN's Crossfire.

My Chemical Romance

Despite the fact that I know R will pester me non-stop with comments about how I am such a poser or that I will never be the musical snob he aspires to be, I have to say that I am really enjoying the newest disc from "My Chemical Romance" that I picked up yesterday. It is just good alt rock music (more rock than alt, which I like) with a really impressive hard, dark undertone. I would give it 4 out of 5 stars. Pick up a copy if you like that sort of thing.

I've been noticably absent from this blog lately. I need to come up with some more ramblings I think. I've got a few floating around my head somewhere. I just need to stay up really late one night high on a combination of caffeine and the soup of chemicals that my brain releases after a particularly good blowjob and pour them all out. Now where did I put that 50 gallon jug of Mountain Dew mixed with Spanish Fly again...

It's the time, of the season for dork-loving...

"What's your name, (What's your name), Who's your sugar daddy??"

CNN posted a story, called "Dork Pride! Suddenly, it's cool to be uncool", saying that it is now cool to be a nerd, geek, or dork. They are raking in all of the technology money! Everyone should have an engineering sugar daddy!

Bella's Birthday

Today is Bella's Birthday. She is two years old. In honor of her birthday, we did a lot of things that Bella likes today:

- We gave them moist dog food. They wolf this stuff down like they may never be able to eat again.

- A car ride that did not involve going to the vet or to the kennel.

- Lots of raw hide.

- Letting Bella sleep where ever she wanted to (usually on one of us).

Here are some pictures of Bella (we would have more, but our computer's hard disk bit the dust today, so our scanner and most of our pictures are temporarily unavailable):

Bella as a baby

Bella hunting lizards

Harry Potter is here

The new book is out and I am eagerly awaiting the delivery of my copy via Amazon.com. Unfortunately I cannot read it until Monday evening since I have to study for my board exam and hope that I will not fail it! It has been a long time since school and information is leaking from my brain. Ugh! Well I am off to study and I am not going to read any news for a while so that I don't hear and leaks about the book. I want to enjoy it! I just love good literature!

Amsterdam, the ultimate city of Freedom!

Amsterdam was pretty cool. It is a very laid back city. It is a pretty small city compared to Paris. When you walk around on the street it feels like a city fair everyday. They have a square in the center of the city where they have an open mic type thing every day and people go out there and perform silly talents. There were hoola hoops and unicyclists and other weird talents. They all speak English since they have American television.

The other cool thing in Amsterdam is that prostitution, gambling, marijuana, hash, and mushrooms are legal! America the country of freedom??? Not!! Everyone should go to Amsterdam once and check it out. There is nothing quite like this city. The entire city loves techno! They were having a giant techno dance party, about 40,000 people, with Armin Van Buren spinning the second day we were there. We couldn't get tickets since it had sold out in about an hour :(. We were bummed. It was called the Sensations White; everyone going had to wear white and they played Trance music. In August, they are having the Sensations Dark party with hard techno. We went out to another club on Saturday night and it played some pretty great techno too. Eric and I could have danced all night long! And yes, they dance just as stupid in Holland as we do in America.

To shop for marijuana and hash you had to go to the coffee shops that were located through out the city. One we frequented a few times was Abraxas. They had smokeable products and eatable products. They had brownies, bon bons, milk shakes, and muffins. They tasted pretty good :) It was a very friendly place with an awesome ambience. There is nothing like going into a coffee shop and smelling marijuana smoke as it fills the air. You can find the shops by just going down the alley's and smelling your way there. People would smoke on the sidewalk too. Not a big deal there. The only people that you could see high out of their mind were tourists.

The Red light district is really not a big deal. Your thought's about what it looks like is like 5 times bigger than it really is. It is pretty small actually. The prostitutes have little plastic boxes they sit in with a red light over them when they are in. If you are interested, you just go up to the box and talk with her. Before we went, Eric and I were thinking that the women would be ugly since it would be hard to find that many pretty women. We were suprised to find quite a few great looking women. You had women to fill all of the porn fantasies: school girl, bad girl, nice girl, teacher, black girl, asian girls (lots of them for all of the asian tourists), etc. They looked like the chicks in porn. They had a bunch of sex toy shops which sold some pretty crazy products, some of which looked painful. They also had a few live sex porno shows. There was actually a sex museum that was supposed to be sex through the ages, we didn't go in since it looked like a rip off. There was also the marijuana colleges and the museum of hash and marijuana. It was interesting to walk around and laugh at all of the asian tour groups that were walking around. You were not allowed to take pictures in the district so we don't have any pictures. All in all, the Red light district is mostly hype. Not a big deal really.

Besides all of that stuff mentioned above, Amsterdam has the Rijksmuseum and the Van Gogh museum. They were pretty cool to visit. The Van Gogh museum was disappointing since they did not have many of his really famous paintings. No "Starry night". They did give a lot of history and had a lot of paintings I did not know he painted. It was interesting since he was crazy:) The Rijksmuseum had a good mix of art from sculptures and paintings to ornate doll houses and silver platters and cups.

Amsterdam was an interesting place to visit.

Hockey Back on Track!

It's official. There will be a hockey season next year! The player basically got shafted (the AP reported that all players will take a 24% pay cut next year and accepted a salary cap and a link between revenue and player salaries) and the owners got everything they wanted. <sarcasm>Good thinking there players. Holding out for a better deal way back in February when the league offered a higher salary cap and no link between revenue and player salaries was clearly a good idea.</sarcasm>

I'm just glad my favorite sport is back in action.

And now, dancing from the true victims of this senseless strike: Referees!

Dave Matthews Band rules!!!

Last night Eric and I drove all the way to Atlanta's HiFi amplitheater so that we could see Dave Matthews Band in concert. I ordered the tickets back in the winter from the Warehouse, the official fan club of dmb. It is cool to belong because you get seniority for ordering tickets. I have belonged since 1996 so Eric and I always get close seats. Last night was actually the farthest we have been in a while, middle lower section, row 12. The amplitheater was small so the seats were still pretty good. The concert kicked ass!! This was the 11th or 12th time I had seen them and they still kick ass! The music was awesome! I felt like I was 18 again without a care in the world and I danced my heart out! It ruled! They played a good mix of new and old songs. To top it off, Trey Anastasio from Phish came out and jammed with them for two songs!! It was history!! I never had gone to a Phish concert because I was too busy going to dmb concerts, but Trey is an awesome guitarist!! There is nothing like being at a concert with good music, the smell of weed burning, and the smell of beer flowing! dmb rules in concert. In this day and age where most bands suck live, it is great to go see a band that is better live than they are on the album! It is like a giant dance party when you are there and if you aren't dancing then you are a fucking square. They covered "Time of the season", which ruled so it was like a hippy love fest!! Here is the set list for those of you that care:

One Sweet World
Dream Girl
Don’t Drink the Water
Hunger For The Great Light
Dancing Nancies
Say Goodbye
#34
Time Of The Season
Granny
Stolen Away On 55th & 3rd
American Baby
Smooth Rider
Stand Up
Jimi Thing *
Louisiana Bayou *
Encore:
You Might Die Trying
What You Are
Special Guests:* Trey Anastasio

More trip info...

Here is some more paris recap. The whole language thing was hard in Paris. We did not take the time to learn too much french since when Eric and I went to Italy, most people knew English. They were used to tourists and knew where the money came from. The French are so egotistical that they think you should have learned their whole language for your 5 day trip! Geez! We got by though. Luckily, Paul and Sue knew enough French to get us by.

We did all of the tourist stuff. We went on a boat-bus tour the first night which was cool. We got to see all of the main attractions and were able to get a good idea of where things were. We ended up at the Eiffel tower just as the sun was about to disappear and we got into line to go up to the very top. After standing in three lines to go up two elevators, it was quite cool being at the top and seeing the city all lit up. We finished up about midnight and tried to find a taxi since we were very far from our hotel. You had to basically jump on the taxi's near the tower because so many people were trying to get one. Finally I almost killed myself and snagged one only to have the guy say he can only drive 3 people not 4 even though he had 4 seats. I guess his water bottles really needed the front seat to sit on! What a dick! Every taxi we took after that had no problem with taking 4 people.

On Day two we went to Notre Dame which wasn't far from Paul and Sue's hotel. It is a spectacular sight. It is just amazing to me that it took 200 hundred years for them to make it from 1400-1600. The gothic architecture was just amazing to see. We wandered around it for a while and just took it in.







After Notre Dame we went on to the Musee D'orsay, a museum that houses many works including some by Monet and Van Gough. It was cool. Eric and I love art so we just loved going into the museums. It is neat to see paintings by famous painters up close so that you can see in person what makes them so great! I am a big fan of impressionists so it was very cool to see real Monets.






That night we went out to dinner and shared a bottle of wine, which is what we tried to do every night! French wine is ok. Sorry Kien, but I gotta say that I didn't like the french wine as much as I did the Italian wine. I guess I am a snob now ;)

Also, people always say that Paris is the city of love and romance. I don't get that. I think Venice is way more romantic than Paris. You can't beat the canals, gondolas, italian music playing along the canals, and the twinkling lights lit along the canals. Paris just does not try very hard to make people feel welcome and to put up the romantic ambience.

Paris: The land of different

I'm going to start with Paris and work my way up to Amsterdam with a bunch of posts. No pictures yet. Sorry.

You know, the wisdom of Pulp Fiction will never cease to amaze me. In this particular case, I'm talking to the point about, "They got same shit over there that we have here. Just there it's a little different."

Examples:

Cars - They are tiny. REALLY tiny. Remember Geo Metros? Those would be the equivalent of a Lincoln Navigator over there. Of course, if my gas was $4.65 a gallon, I would drive a petal powered sewing machine with wheels if it could get me to work.

Driving - I used to think that driving in Europe was absolutely insane: No lines on the road, cars within inches of hitting each other, scooters and motorcycles weaving in and out at their leisure... It's a scary place for anyone but a NYC cab driver to drive. But the more I watched it while I was in Paris from our 4th floor window, the more I started to realize that it really was a pretty elegant driving system. From above, it really looks like water flowing through a pipe. Cars are small enough that they can squeeze by some pretty small spaces. Moreover, you never see someone stick there head out of a window and flip the guy off next to them for getting too close or cutting them off. They just let the guy in if he gets even the smallest part of his car in front. It really has a very Zen like feel to the whole thing (once you stop worrying about dying I mean).

Refrigeration - Apparently that technology has not crossed over to Europe in general. Drinks were never served with ice. The museums were always 10 degrees warmer than I thought they should be. We did have a very Marilyn Monroe moment involving Sue's skirt and an air conditioner vent inside the Louvre though:)

Fast Food - First, they don't have a lot. Yes, we went in a McDonalds. Yes, it really is called a Royale with Cheese. Yes, they have beer (it tastes like every light beer you have ever had). But there are other differences. Most noticeable is that the largest size drink there is...uh...disappointing for Americans. It's about the size of our medium drinks here (the regular was the size of those early morning coffee cups). I felt like going SuperTroopers on the lady and telling her, "I want a liter of cola!" I would have if she had spoken any English.

Language - Speaking of which, the English speaking portion of Paris is SMALL. Either that or they just cannot be bothered. To be fair, I never bothered either, as I never took a foreign language in High School. That makes me completely useless when reading French signs or speaking to wait staff. I went into a little pastry store to order a...uh...lets call it a very rich doughnut because I can't remember the French word for it. It went something like this:

Lady behind counter: Bonjour

Me: Bonjour (this was the only French word I could consistently use correctly). I would like one of these. < points to a collection of doughnuts in the case>

Lady behind counter: <something unintelligible in French>

Me: (I assume she asked me how many I wanted) two (I even hold up the fingers)

Lady behind counter: (slightly more angry) <something unintelligible in French>

Me: (I think she may now have asked what flavor. Or if my belly button is purple. Or perhaps it was just a snippy comment about how I as an American should wipe my ass with the napkins they have because she was never going to serve one of her pasteries to someone who could not learn a language like French. Hard to tell for me.) Uh....That one <points at a doughnut>

Lady behind counter: (slightly more angry still and louder) <something unintelligible in French>

Me: (starting to drool now and noticing that like 14 people have walked in in the mean time and are trying to decide if I have had a stroke and lost the use of all communication functions or if I am just an American) <points at a doughnut> (I don't even bother trying to pretend I know what she is saying any more).

Luckily some lady behind me that could speak English saved me at that point. Otherwise, I might still be standing at that counter blindly pointing at the pseudo-doughnut.

America, F%$k Ya Again!

Just as an FYI, we are back in the good old U. S. of A. after our fourth of July celebration in Amsterdam. I will say for those unaware that the reason the blog has been quiet for so long is that Sue and I were on vacation in Paris for 5 days and Amsterdam for 4 days. It was great. Really great! But Sue and I are both too jet lagged to write anything clever at the moment (7 hours difference is rough!). When we have pictures back (Thursday or Friday), I intend to post a ton of them to the blog.

All's Quiet on the Southern Front

Just as an FYI, this blog will be going dark for a bit. Feel free to leave comments bemoaning how you will be unable to feel complete without the constant wit and humor that you get from this online fountain of Sue's and I's thoughts.

What are your plans?

As Eric and I have mentioned, we have been watching a lot of Six feet under to catch up on this great show! We just rented Season 2 and have been watching everyday.

Anyway, watching this show makes you think about your own death and that you are not immortal. Eric and I have been talking about it and have discussed our own wishes for when we die. It is sad, but most people don't talk about it because they are afraid and so their wishes are never carried out. Look at Terri Schiavo, if she would have taken the time to make out a living will then she would not have had to spend 15 years trapped in her own broken body! How depressing. If you do not have any legal documents, then at least tell all of your family and friends your wishes. If you have that sticker on your license that says that you want to donate your organs or body, it won't happen if one member in your family disagrees. If you don't want to be buried, tell them! It is important. Sure funerals are for the families to get closure, but you should be able to have what you want done with your body.

My wishes are as follows: If possible, donate all of my organs to whoever needs them. I will have an open casket, if the my body is not mangled, so that the family and Eric can see me. Buy a cheap casket for that, it doesn't matter! Then cremate me, please. I think burying people in the ground is so wasteful. Just take my ashes and spread them in Ireland so that I may return to my roots.

I want bagpipes to play "Amazing Grace" at my service, I am not religious, but I love the way it sounds. It truly touches the soul! Maybe 'tis because me Irish/Scotish blood be flowin through me veins. The whole cd at the link above for Amazing Grace is good, actually. I may want "My heart will go on" on bagpipes too... It is a beautiful song.

I also want Dave Matthews "Lie in our Graves" to be blasted at some point during the service. I want everyone to dance like hippies, and to be free! After my funeral, I want everyone to have a party and to celebrate my life, not mourn it! Have a drink, or five, on me!

So, do you have a plan....?

America, F#$k Ya!

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Six Feet Under

Sue posted about this in her "Home crap Home" post, but I had to write my own plug for it. It's that good:

While I realize that Sue and I are probably the last people on the face of this earth to watch it, I have to plug a really great show on HBO: Six Feet Under. The show is absolutely brilliant dark comedy; funny, witty, and insanely poignant in ways that I could only dream about being.

So far we have only been watching season 1, so I can't speak to whether the show gets better or not. But if this any indication, I think Sue and I will be making several trips to Blockbuster over the next several weeks.

Medical Community 1 - Insane Frothing Right Wing Nuts 0

Schiavo Autopsy Finds No Sign of Trauma

Wow, what a freaking surprise. The medical community, with there "science" and "medical knowledge" and all that other voodoo was 100% correct when they pronounced that Terri Schivao had about as much chance of getting out of that bed and eating some delicious chicken nuggets as my car does of driving itself around and getting itself an unlimited number of lube jobs (just wanted an excuse to say lube jobs). From the article:

"He said she would not have been able to eat or drink if she had been given food by mouth as her parents' requested...The brain weighed 615 grams, roughly half of the expected weight of a human brain...This damage was irreversible, and no amount of therapy or treatment would have regenerated the massive loss of neurons."

So there you have it. Vegetable. All the whinings of the parents that she might get out of that bed and walk around were complete and utter crap. This is why we let courts and doctors decide these sorts of things when there is an arguement and why 99.9999999999% of the time we keep the f$%king left and right media whores at bay.

For the record, if I am ever missing half my brain, please please let me die quietly after a nice ground up steak is put through my feeding tube and I get one last blowjob from my sexy nurse wife:)

Home, crap, home...

Oh yes, I have returned from my trip to New York/Michigan. It was pretty cool. I think I took the heat with me though. It was in the 90's that whole time in NY and Michigan and I guess it is cooling off up there now. Of course back here in AL it has been in the mid-90s, feels like over 100, DAMN HOT!! I feel bad for the dogs and ALL of the women that are pregnant here which includes all of the wives at Eric's work and one of the women employees. Must avoid drinking their water...

My weekend in New York kicked ass! I got to be a suprise for my friend Sue at her bridal shower! I like being a suprise! Then I got to see a lot of New York I have never been to before. I did not get to go to the city this trip, but it was very cool to see all of the New York landscape. It is very pretty. I was in Newburgh, NY briefly, Central Valley, NY for the shower, Warwick, NY (The home of Paul), Goshen, NY (The home of Sue O.) and from Warwick, NY to Rochester, NY (4.5 hour drive).

The bridal shower was cool since it was held at a Japenese Hibachi Steakhouse called Gasho. The building was an old farmhouse that was brought over from Japan. They had a beautiful garden in the back. You sat around a cooking surface and the cooks made your food right in front of you. Delicious. I also got to meet all of Paul and Sue's family! A lot of family! After that I got to spend a few days with my good friends Paul and Sue who are great hosts!

Paul and Sue introduced me to the greatness of the HBO series "Six feet under" and let me bring the first season home with me so that Eric and I can enjoy it. What a great show!! We have been watching it everyday. It is just so funny and well written! Lauren Ambrose, Claire on the show, is the best character, I think. She was in the movies Can't hardley wait and Psycho Beach Party, two great films. That is my plug. I think everyone should watch it! There is actually still good tv out there, you just have to have HBO. Screw the damn reality tv shows!

After 4.5 days in NY, I flew off to Michigan. I got to see family and friends. I got to hang out with some of the MSU crew! Woot! I got to hang out with my mom and sisters and some of Eric's family. I rented a car that was just awesome. I got a brand new Pontiac bonneyville. It was luxurious! It had a XM radio! How cool! I just love the techno channel "The Station". It played such awesome hard trance! I left Michigan two days early because I could not deal with my family anymore and I missed Eric and the puppies way to much!!! I am home again with my "family" and happy again, except for the heat!

It was quite the adventure and I learned some things about myself. One, I enjoy living far away from family and two, I am done with Michigan. It is my home state, it will always have a place in my heart and I still have great friends and family there, but I am ready to try a new place to live, preferably a blue state. I have grown a lot being so far away and Eric and I have developed a super strong relationship being down here. I recommend to everyone that you should cut those cords from your parents and move away for a least a few years! You need to go off and be on your own to be able to develop into who you really are! Good luck to my friend Nicole who is considering just this!!

Ramblings of Eric: Part 4 - What if I don't have free will?

In response to my second Ramblings post, Paul asked,

"...I think something like this is jazzed up with something more personal. Why do you care so much at an everyday level about free will? How does free will (or lack thereof) affect Eric today? tomorrow?"

Paul is on his way to becoming a psychologist, and it shows in his question:) But it's a very reasonable question to ask. After all, no point in debating something like this if there is not a reason to at the end of the argument rainbow.

This is not why I believe in free will. These are the results in my mind of a world that truly accepted there is no free will.

Lets assume for a second that determinism really is correct. All of my decisions, all my life choices, were decided a picoseconds after the Big Bang (lets ignore quantum mechanics here. Yeah, I know that quantum mechanics PROVES that true determinism does not exist. But something more complicated takes it place that only clouds what we are talking about here). To me personally, that means a few important things:

1. Our accomplishments in life mean swat. Why feel good about the fact that you got good grades in school, or had that threesome with the twin hotties at camp? You did not make any personal decisions that lead to those accomplishments. They are just a product of the environment. It would be like the Sun being proud of the fact that it shined today, or the Earth being proud that it held 6+ billion people on the ground.
2. There is no such thing as moral superiority. Moral superiority rests firmly on the ability of some individuals to resist temptations that others do not.
3. Our mistakes in life should not be punished. What's the point of punishing someone for choices they really had no control over? What I mean to say is, if I was hypnotized into shooting up a liquor store and could prove it, would you still punish me? In general, the law explicitly denies that people under duress should be held accountable for their actions (within some important limits. You can't go on a shooting spree because someone threatens to make you listen to 80's pop music.).
4. Its very hard to reconcile the lack of free will and a God (especially The God). Why bother creating us if we are just robots? If you really setup the whole universe with perfect knowledge of all our actions, why is there so much evil in the world? (This is most certainly going to be expanded in some future post).

Those are the biggies for me. #1 bothers me a lot more than #2 or #3, because I think I could argue there are other reasons to punish people even if determinism is true. You just can't claim morally superiority for doing it anymore, which does not bother me because I am a relative moralist anyways. #4 is only important if you believe a God (I do, but that is tied into my belief in free will to a large degree. I can't accept one without the other. I'll save that for another argument on another post).

Note that where I see life being utterly pointless in these results, others might see something positive. For one thing, you might feel better that your poor choices were not your fault (although really, that's a small comfort since feeling better in that case is also completely determined by the universe's giant state machine). Also, without free will, you don't need a/the God to explain much of anything (proving this is an exercise left to the reader).

Once again, its after midnight and I need some sleep...

Ramblings of Eric: Part 3 - The All Request Lunch Hour

I was out playing dodge ball with the Huntvegas posse yesterday, and we got to talking about my last rambling post. R (yes, Weapon of Choice R. I've actually see him:)) suggested that I should request topics from my readers, give my rambling opinion on their topic, then see if I can defend said opinion. I instantly liked this idea because (1) I don't have to think up topics to discuss and (2) it's takes a huge ego to think that people give a shit about your opinions. Since I have such an ego, and since I am obviously lazy with coming up with things to blog about, lets give it try and see what the group out there is interested in hearing me ramble on about.

We now return you to our regularly scheduled program of pornography music mixed with dancing clowns who look disturbingly like your high school principal...

Ramblings of Eric: Part 2 - Free Will

The first of the rambling posts that isn’t about rambling posts:

I’m an ardent believer in free will. So much so that nearly the whole of my belief system about humanity is based on this one idea. My thoughts on religion, the presence of a soul, abortion, gun control, the death penalty, addiction, love, hate, the presence of evil in our world; all of them tie back to this singular belief in humanity’s ultimately free will. So if I am going to put down any other ramblings about these beliefs, I need to start with this one.

To be precise, I’m speaking about what most would call “true” free will. Philosophy majors would call it “internal” free will, making a distinction between external free (whether others allow me to do what I will) versus internal free will (whether I really decide what my will is), so I guess I will do the same. I’m not interested in external free will (at least not here). What I’m talking about is internal free will. It is defined (at least by me) by the ability of an individual to make choices regardless of current or previous external stimuli. This stands in stark contrast to determinism, in which my brain, and with it my identity, is nothing but a series of very complicated chemical reactions.

The main reason I believe in free will really quite simple. Every thought I have appears to stem from this free will. Every thought I have reinforces the notation that my thoughts are independent. And I’m willing to admit that perhaps this is merely a personal delusion. But, and this is the important part now, so pay attention: I am not the only person who has this feeling. Ask yourself if you believe that you are conscious; if you believe that your choice of actions are your own. Every sane person on planet will agree that, at the very least, they have the same delusion that their choices appear free.

So now we come to the crux of the argument. Imagine that you are looking at a tree in the middle of a great field. You see the tree, no denying that. But perhaps you are mistaken, or your senses are confused. So you ask your friend with you if they also see a tree. He also affirms that, yes, he sees the tree as well. Now you get all your friends to come, and lo and behold, they ALL see the tree. To deny that the tree is their now would simply not be rational. This is identical to the argument for free will. The fact that everyone has the same perception of free will should imply that free will must be real. Otherwise, we have to accept that EVERYTHING we perceive is suspect. That is, we have no more reason to accept that the tree we all see is any more real than the free will we all perceive.

Of course, it is not that easy. If it were, every philosophy major would be out of job pretty quickly. I realize there are all sorts of issues with the above. For one, it is obvious that the physical brain has SOMETHING to do with how my thought process operates. Any Friday night that involves consuming large quantities of alcohol should confirm this. I tend to picture the mind as just another filter through which my conscious views the world. It’s no different from my eyes or ears. Both can be damaged, impaired, etc, and this can have a drastic effect on my perception of the world.

I think that is enough rambling for one night. Next time: Religion, politics, and the Great Pumpkin: a thesis of everything.

Ramblings of Eric: Part 1

Warning: I wrote this pretty late on a Sunday night with a LOT of caffeine roaring through my system (thank God for the spell checker). So it may come off as a one of those African bushmen who communicate by clicking their mouths trying to type English using only his left hand to type while reading Penthouse stories. Such are the breaks.

I've had a few posts floating around in mind the last few weeks. All of them are really just the random things that I think about on the way to work, or school, while waiting at the dentist, mowing the yard or whatever. I think a lot about politics, religion, society, people's weird obsessions with what other people think (including my own unhealthily obsession with this topic), free will, philosophy, software, that next great idea; All of these are these little random floating ideas that never really become anything. They never become coherent if you get my meaning. That is to say, they are good ideas, but I never build on them in my head, or I distract myself with computer games or TV or radio or whatever else is taking up space in my life.

Did you ever have run one of those thought experiments in a creative writing class where you take one word and you just start writing whatever comes to your head? I was always amazed at the crazy shit my brain would pour out if I just shut up for a few minutes and let it think.

One thing I have noticed lately is that I no longer listen to the radio in the car. I find that if I turn the radio off, my mind can mull for a longer period of time without getting distracted. Ditto for TV. I'm one of those odd people you see in traffic that appear to be holding animated conversation with the sun visor and you think must be on a cell phone that you just can't see. Except that I am not. I'm debating with myself some of these ideas I have about life. It's odd too, because I will often come up with what I think are excellent concepts, only to spend the next several minutes explaining to myself each of the holes in this newly minted idea.

So my goal here is this: I'm going to start writing these ideas down here in the hopes that the simple act of taking time out to put these ideas online will force me to examine them more fully. I don't know how many of these there will be, and I don't really know what they will be about. Just as fair warning, these are not going to be my usual, "make fun of the news" posts. But perhaps they will be interesting. Heck, you might even agree with one from time to time. And if you don't, maybe you will convince me that I am wrong. Would not be the first time.

Star Wars TIE Fighter Case Mod

Extremetech.com is holding a weekly case mod competition. The picture below is the case mod for the first winner.

Wow... Good lord this is geeky. More geeky than I shall ever attain.

ABC News: Cruise Company Saws Massive Ship in Half

ABC News: Cruise Company Saws Massive Ship in Half

Ok, as a man and as someone who pretends to have an engineering degree ("My classes were in the engineering building! I took physics!") this is just plain cool to me: Royal Caribbean SAWED one of their cruise ships in half, pulled the two pieces apart, and inserted a new 73 foot wide prefabricated section in the middle of the ship.

Let us join together as men and salute this fine use of circular saws and torches! TOOLS! <insert required grunting here>

No Sue

Sue is in New York this weekend for one of our friend's Bridal shower. After that, she is heading to Michigan for a week to enjoy some time with her parents. So I am all alone here at home for the next 10 days or so. Now I know how Sue feels when I am gone. It sucks.

For one thing, I am bored. Really bored. Bored like I want to read the nutritional fact of everything I eat. Bored like the internet does not interest me after 20 minutes or so. Bored like I want to go to work. You get the idea.

Useful Advice Anywhere

Eric Sink (who usually does very technically posts about source code control systems) wrote a good summary of what to do so that you will not piss off folks in a hurry. Read it.

http://software.ericsink.com/entries/airport_madness.html

This post is specifically talking about airports, but I think this sort of logic could be applied anywhere: malls, restaurants, movie theaters, gang bangs, you name it! Oh if only I had the power to zap people with a Tazer when they were moving too slowly in front of me. The world would be a far better place all around.

Condoms get their day!!!

ABC news had a story today about how condom commercials will get to appear on Prime time television tonight for the first time. Trojan condom commercials will appear on the WB after 9 pm and on NBC's 10 pm hour. Instead of "Trojan man" the condom company has decided to use a more serious ad by using sex statistics such as: "40% of people who know they are HIV+ do not tell their partners. Show you care about your partner and yourself. Use a condom everytime." "Trojan, pleasure you want, protection you trust". Go Trojan! You can see the new commercial on the Trojan website before it airs tonight. You can also enter the site and get a free sample! You get to pick the type you want. Girls get Her pleasure or mint tingle! I think most condom company's will send you a free sample. I remeber my first semester at MSU and we got coupon books for various things and one was for 65 free condoms from Adam and Eve. What a fun package. They were different colors, flavors, and textures ;) I was the only one brave enought to get them so people would borrow from me. Plus I worked at Planned Parenthood and got free ones constantly since I was a penis captain and went to safe sex parties all the time! To quote Julia Roberts in Pretty woman: "I'm a safety girl."



Also at Trojan's website there is an ad for their new Mint tingle condoms: "Trojan Mint Tingle condoms feature flavor, fragrance and color for sensual excitement during foreplay and love making." Mmm...tingling sensation. These condoms rule! Well men, now you should have your mint condoms with you at the club and say: "Hey baby, need to freshen your breath? Give me head!" :)

You can also play games on Trojan's web site such as "How far would you go?" and "Trojan Ball buster".

Who knows if Alabama will even allow these commercials since that in Alabama as in several other southern states, it is illegal to teach anything but abstinence in school! Stupid conservative morons!