Thank God its Friday

I was surfing around at work doing anything but actual work when I ran across the following from Overheard in the Office:

"It's about time to not come to work for a couple of days."

Ramen sister. Ramen.

Today has been just one of those days. First, its casual Friday for everyone but me. Why just me you say? Because I had to deliver our program's monthly review today to our Major, which means dressing in above average business casual. Any day that I am denied dressing like a slacker pisses me off right off the bat. Second, I did not know that I would be delivering said presentation until I got to work this morning, which meant I had to drive back home, change into something presentable, then drive back to work. With my Jeep that mean about $3:). Third, said meeting was 2 hours long of which I spoke for about 10 minutes. The rest was spent spinning my ID badge in various yo-yo like manners and trying my best not to think of anyone naked (engineers...<shudder>)

That's combined to put me in a sour mode that makes work rough. Bah. Just keep telling yourself, "One more hour and I am out of here...59 minutes 50 seconds and I am out of here...".

Pastafarians

Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

OK, I'm clearly slipping to have missed such a hilarious parody on the internet for so long. The first time Sue and I read the description of this yesterday we laughed so hard that we cried a little.

Anyways, for those who don't want to go through the trouble of reading the entire site, I'll sum up. In response to the Kanas City school board allowing intelligent Design, a physics student made up his own religion and demanded that Kansas City school board also teach this system. The main tenets are a follows:

• The Universe was created by an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster. All evidence pointing towards evolution was intentionally planted by this being.


• According to the pastafarians, the monster created the world starting with a mountain, trees and a midget and continues to guide human affairs with his "noodly appendage." Heaven is depicted as having a stripper factory and a beer volcano.






• They refuse to use the word "evolution". Instead, they say things like "logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence".


• Their prayers to "Him" are typically ended by "Ramen", instead of "Amen". For example, one of their chants is: "Flying Spaghetti Monster, Pie Saucus Domine, Ramen"


• They believe it is disrespectful to teach beliefs in Flying Spaghetti Monsterism without wearing His chosen outfit, which of course is full pirate regalia


• Global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct consequence of the decline in numbers of pirates since the 1800s. The graph below showing the inverse correlation between the pirates and global temperatures proves it!

Napolean Gates

Bill Gates Goes to College

The video is a litte grainy and the sound sucks in places since it is a hand held video taping a projector at Microsoft's developer conference, but it is hilarious if you like Napolean Dynamite.

Slurpee turns 40

Salon.com: The Slurpee at 40

Why must I read articles like this when I am living 300 miles from the nearest 7-11?!?!? Why God! Why?!?! How I miss that rush of completely empty sugar calories, caffeine, brain freeze that only a Coke slurpee can deliver...

According to the article, "Here in the United States the drink is most beloved in Detroit...". Wikipedia also points out that more Slurpees are consumed per year in Detroit then anywhere else in the USA. I think both of these articles must have been based on older data. I'd be willing to wager there was a significant drop in total consumption in that region right around the time Sue and I left:)

University Research Into Stupidity

Backpack designed to generate power from walking

I happen to see this article on Yahoo News about this backpack that researchers at the University of Pennsylvania that can generate electricity just from the act of walking with it. Cool I thought. I could use something like that for my IPod, or my cell phone at just the right moment. But then I got to this:

"Humping along just under 85 pounds (38 kg) of weight in the backpack can produce up to 7 watts of electricity"

85 pounds? 85 POUNDS? Are you kidding? Do you know how many batteries I can carry around and still be under 85 pounds? What ivory tower dumb ass thought this one up? Oh right...University of Pennsylvania ivory tower dumb asses.

Don't forget about the pets.

I love pets! I love my dogs. They are like family. Katrina was a horrific storm and it caused a lot of physical and emotional pain. The humans that stayed down there were just plain stupid. They should have all left. They had four days to get the hell out of dodge. I feel for the pets. They had no choice. They were abandoned and betrayed. Their owners stayed during the hurricane and were able to leave after, if they survived, but the government did not let anyone take pets with them on buses to leave the area. So after the hurricane there were poor, innocent dogs just wandering the disgusting waters of New Orleans looking for a familiar face or for a meal. Pets were drowning in the water because they could not make it to a safe area or they were trapped in homes or tied up by chains. It angers me and it saddens me. All those pets and animals did not need to suffer in this way. The Humane Society is trying it's best to find and rescue as many abandoned pets and animals that they can. Please donate if you can. I commend the Humane society for all of it's work. Adopt a pet if you can to help save some of these animals that need a home and want nothing more than a chance at life and love. I would adopt more dogs if Eric would let me. I think everyone's life would be better with a pet. They love unconditionally and they make you smile at least 1000 times a day.

Labor Day is Confusing

Every year I have the exact same thought on Labor Day:

This is supposed to be the day that we celebrate the labor of all the hard working individuals of this country. How exactly are we "celebrating" labor by all sleeping in and having the day off? :)

We are all 3 days away from total starvation

Is anyone else but me severely traumatized by the whole situation in New Orleans? For the love of God. 3 days. Apparently all it takes is three days without power and a shower and all of society will collapse. It is like we are watching the Lord of the Flies played out in real life. All I can hope is that it is specific to New Orleans. I mean, they lost power in New York and Michigan for up to a week last year and those folks did not riot, loot, or shoot at people who were attempting to rescue them.

What's worse is I can almost understand it: I had to fight the urge to horde gasoline yesterday. Looking at prices of gas on the way home ($3.25 a gallon was not uncommon in Huntsville), I'm not sure fighting that urge was the best idea. The only thing that stopped me is knowing that a rush for gas will only make a gas supply crunch worst. The reality is that gas stations do not have enough gas for everyone to fill up at the same time even when there is no crimp in the supply. That's just not the way the system works.

And folks I work with are starting to get on my nerves. I swear if one more person comes into my office and breaks my concentration in order to tell me something else horrible that happened in New Orleans, I am just going to have beat them to death with my computer speakers.