I'm going to start with Paris and work my way up to Amsterdam with a bunch of posts. No pictures yet. Sorry.
You know, the wisdom of Pulp Fiction will never cease to amaze me. In this particular case, I'm talking to the point about, "They got same shit over there that we have here. Just there it's a little different."
Examples:
Cars - They are tiny. REALLY tiny. Remember Geo Metros? Those would be the equivalent of a Lincoln Navigator over there. Of course, if my gas was $4.65 a gallon, I would drive a petal powered sewing machine with wheels if it could get me to work.
Driving - I used to think that driving in Europe was absolutely insane: No lines on the road, cars within inches of hitting each other, scooters and motorcycles weaving in and out at their leisure... It's a scary place for anyone but a NYC cab driver to drive. But the more I watched it while I was in Paris from our 4th floor window, the more I started to realize that it really was a pretty elegant driving system. From above, it really looks like water flowing through a pipe. Cars are small enough that they can squeeze by some pretty small spaces. Moreover, you never see someone stick there head out of a window and flip the guy off next to them for getting too close or cutting them off. They just let the guy in if he gets even the smallest part of his car in front. It really has a very Zen like feel to the whole thing (once you stop worrying about dying I mean).
Refrigeration - Apparently that technology has not crossed over to Europe in general. Drinks were never served with ice. The museums were always 10 degrees warmer than I thought they should be. We did have a very Marilyn Monroe moment involving Sue's skirt and an air conditioner vent inside the Louvre though:)
Fast Food - First, they don't have a lot. Yes, we went in a McDonalds. Yes, it really is called a Royale with Cheese. Yes, they have beer (it tastes like every light beer you have ever had). But there are other differences. Most noticeable is that the largest size drink there is...uh...disappointing for Americans. It's about the size of our medium drinks here (the regular was the size of those early morning coffee cups). I felt like going SuperTroopers on the lady and telling her, "I want a liter of cola!" I would have if she had spoken any English.
Language - Speaking of which, the English speaking portion of Paris is SMALL. Either that or they just cannot be bothered. To be fair, I never bothered either, as I never took a foreign language in High School. That makes me completely useless when reading French signs or speaking to wait staff. I went into a little pastry store to order a...uh...lets call it a very rich doughnut because I can't remember the French word for it. It went something like this:
Lady behind counter: Bonjour
Me: Bonjour (this was the only French word I could consistently use correctly). I would like one of these. < points to a collection of doughnuts in the case>
Lady behind counter: <something unintelligible in French>
Me: (I assume she asked me how many I wanted) two (I even hold up the fingers)
Lady behind counter: (slightly more angry) <something unintelligible in French>
Me: (I think she may now have asked what flavor. Or if my belly button is purple. Or perhaps it was just a snippy comment about how I as an American should wipe my ass with the napkins they have because she was never going to serve one of her pasteries to someone who could not learn a language like French. Hard to tell for me.) Uh....That one <points at a doughnut>
Lady behind counter: (slightly more angry still and louder) <something unintelligible in French>
Me: (starting to drool now and noticing that like 14 people have walked in in the mean time and are trying to decide if I have had a stroke and lost the use of all communication functions or if I am just an American) <points at a doughnut> (I don't even bother trying to pretend I know what she is saying any more).
Luckily some lady behind me that could speak English saved me at that point. Otherwise, I might still be standing at that counter blindly pointing at the pseudo-doughnut.
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5 comments:
I dunno if it's the same in France as it is in England, but in England when you put up two fingers like a victory sign, but with palm facing you, that's the equivalent of flipping the bird.
Like I said, the French may not be offended at that, but when you said her next statement was said angrily, that's the first thing that came to mind.
It is ok Kien. We got by. Eric, the pastry was a beignet;)
Right....Beignet. Speaking of that: Why the hell is NOTHING prounouced the way it looks in French? Stupid silent letters...
Yeah Kien, no need to feel bad. It's not your fault that I am ligustically challenged:)
I had french 10, yes 10. I had a month of it in 6th grade and I was too young to care. I took 4 semesters of Spanish, but that wasn't as useful in Paris. Thanks anyways Kieno!
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