In local news today, a large candle and it's stand have been charged with assault on a Michigan woman. Police say the large candle and its partner were resting on top of the couple's bedroom headboard when they decided to attempt to kill the home's occupants, a Mr and Mrs Wilson. The candle and stand fell approximently 5' and landing a mere 3 inches from the head of Mrs Wilson.
Candle and Stand
Police say they are still looking in a motive, but believe jealously may have played a role in these tragic events. Mrs Wilson was having really great sex at the time, and it is possible that the candle/stand duo became so enraged with jealousy they decided to try and end the life of Ms Wilson.
Said Mrs Wilson, "Even though I nearly died, it was worth it. Mr. Wilson is the greatest lover ever".
If convicted, the candle will be burned to death.
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment