Pregnant No More

So as most of you know, Sue gave birth to Riley Eric Wilson at 7:49pm on March 27th. Some fun things to know about the little man:

1) He was 22" long at birth. That's off the chart in terms of his height percentile, but at least greater than the 97% percentile. No wonder he had to come out via C-section:)

2) I swear this is true: at 3 days old, he rolled over while we were at the doctor's office. That has to be some sort of record!

3) He snorts when he is excited. Its the cutest thing ever.

Ways to get the Baby Out Quicker

Sue and I have been brainstorming ideas about how to get the baby out quicker. So far, here is what we have:

• Squeeze Sue like a tube of toothpaste
• Smoke him out
• Large cash bribes
• Send in Bella: She's breed to get badgers out of a small hole. A kid should be easy.
• Set a mousetrap with cheese on a string.
• One word: Trampoline

Anyone else have a plan? At this point we're ready to try pretty much anything:)

Less than 20 days!!

I am sooo happy that we hit the under 20 day mark!! Come on baby, mama is ready to get you out and meet the kid who has been kicking me all this time ;) Also, it is very uncomfortable in the last month of pregnancy...

Lamaze Class #2

2 down, 2 to go.

This week was all about the few weeks before labor, and the first stage of labor where you're cervix opens to 6cm. Things we learned:

- Pregnancy is just plain gross. There are plugs that have to fall out. Sacs to be punctured. Fluid to spill everywhere. At one point the teacher suggested that you may WANT an enema (something I could never imagine anyone requesting). Like Sue said after we left, "People talk about how beautiful birth is. Those people are stupid. Before birth is gross. The baby is gross when it comes out. And after the baby comes out is gross."

- Apparently nipple stimulation is a good way to get labor moving along. Just to be safe, I thought we should stimulate both our nipples. You know... to cover all our bases.

- We learned two breathing patterns to help get you through the early contractions. I'm coming around to the idea that these at least might help to dull the pain a little bit; Take the edge off of it as our teacher says. Time will tell I guess.

- A big part of class was working on learning to relax parts of your body. That way when you are stressed (read: having a baby), you will be able to relax your muscles and release tension. At one point she walked us through an exercise where she sounded like a stage magician trying to hypnotize us all. Is it weird that I want to cluck like a chicken every time I hear the word "baby" now?

Less than two months left!!

This is a little late but look, less than two months left to go!! Hopefully the baby won't come too late, he probably will be at least 8 pounds as it is!!!

Lamaze Class #1

Sue and I had our first Lamaze/birthing class yesterday. I don't really believe for a second that some relaxing breaths will make this any less painful, but the other information we get in these classes is helpful. Sue and I have repeating that line from Gone with the Wind over and over lately: "I don't know nothing about birthing no babies!" These classes help suppress that feeling a little bit.

I truly believe in the "it's a small world" theory now for 2 reasons: 1) Scott Weeks, a guy I went to high school with, was in our class and 2) I was in Boy Scouts with our instructor's son.

Next week we start the lying on the floor and breathing and all that jazz. This week was just walking through all the stages of the birth. BTW: I didn't really need to see how much my wife's cervix will have to stretch to get that kid out (10cm for those playing at home).

Did you know the average labor is 18 hours long??? Crap. And apparently they don't want you even coming to the hospital until you're most of the way through it. They say its because you can be more comfortable at home. NEWS FLASH DOC: I would be more comfortable with $100 million dollars of monitors and machines hooked to my wife during that!

New Plan

As a follow up to my last post, maybe we could try this. You know... just in case my kid turns out to be a dinosaur of some sort:)



From http://xkcd.com/531

Babies R Us

So its getting closer to baby time and I'm finally starting to freak out about it a little bit. I mean, its a freaking BABY! A little person. And more importantly its OUR little person. How the fuck does this work? I mean, the baby is going to come out; we get like a day in hospital to figure everything out, and then its "so long, good luck with that!".

Before our baby class this week, I was really kind of mellow about the whole thing. Since that class, its like a switch has been flipped in my head. All I've been thinking about is all the ways I could really screw this up. Nothing specific. Just a general dread that this is all going to end very badly.

Someone tell me this is normal.

Third trimester!

W00t, I am in the third trimester today!! Three more months and we can finally meet this baby that likes to punch and kick me all the time ;) Can't wait to meet the mini us!

100 days to go

We are getting down to the home strech. Only 100 days to go! Go Sue!

It's a Boy!!!

That is right, our baby is a boy! We just had the ultrasound and it was very exciting!! He kept holding his junk so it took forever for the lady to see what was down there! It is Eric's son ;) He also likes to move and shake a lot ;) Here are the first pics!!

Heartbeat

Today Sue went in for the first checkup with her doctor.

First off: just so no one is concerned, everything is going perfectly well.

The big news was that we heard the heartbeat for the first time today.

I don't quite know how to describe it. To say it was the most beautiful thing I've ever heard would have been an understatement (yea, I know that sounds sappy; Bite me).

My thoughts went something like this:

"That's my baby!"

"Holy crap that heart is beating fast. Thank God Sue told me that was normal or I would seriously be freaking out"

"I love you Sue for doing this with me"

"I think it would be hard for me to be more proud or happy than I am right now"

"Wait! I was listening to that. Don't turn that off!"

Countdown to Babies

Yesterday I wrote the little countdown application you see to the right. I'm pretty proud of it, even if it is only 30 or so lines of code (of course, just as I was going to post this I noticed the count was off by a day).

Baby FTW!

So for those few who don't know already:

Sue and I are having a baby!!!!!!

That's right; Soon there will be a little Eric or Susanne running around our house. Imagine a kid as smart as me and with as much common sense as Sue:) He/she could rule the world!

This comic pretty much sums up my thought about the miracle of the birthing process:

http://xkcd.com/387/

Here is our current baby FAQ:

Are you excited?

Are you crazy? Of course we're excited! We're having a F#@KING BABY!!!!!

How far along are you?

Six weeks as of today.

And that would make you due?

We are currently expecting our bundle of joy on or about March 24th.

Do you know what you are having?

Its a little early for that sort of thing. Ask again at the end of September and we may have a better answer.

Do you have names picked up?

Negotiations are at a delicate crossroads and are ongoing at this time.

Was this an "accident"?

No. Sue and I have been trying for a few months now.

Are you going to get a minivan?

Sue has made me swear that we will NEVER get a minivan. Luckily, our Mustang actually includes the extra latches for the baby seat so we should be OK on that front for a while.

Are you going to change/disappear once you have the baby?

We will do our best not to. In fact, you will probably get sick of seeing us and the baby:) You'll want a nice quiet day where my kid isn't following us around asking "Why is the sky blue?" or "Can we get ice cream?".