Lamaze Class #2

2 down, 2 to go.

This week was all about the few weeks before labor, and the first stage of labor where you're cervix opens to 6cm. Things we learned:

- Pregnancy is just plain gross. There are plugs that have to fall out. Sacs to be punctured. Fluid to spill everywhere. At one point the teacher suggested that you may WANT an enema (something I could never imagine anyone requesting). Like Sue said after we left, "People talk about how beautiful birth is. Those people are stupid. Before birth is gross. The baby is gross when it comes out. And after the baby comes out is gross."

- Apparently nipple stimulation is a good way to get labor moving along. Just to be safe, I thought we should stimulate both our nipples. You know... to cover all our bases.

- We learned two breathing patterns to help get you through the early contractions. I'm coming around to the idea that these at least might help to dull the pain a little bit; Take the edge off of it as our teacher says. Time will tell I guess.

- A big part of class was working on learning to relax parts of your body. That way when you are stressed (read: having a baby), you will be able to relax your muscles and release tension. At one point she walked us through an exercise where she sounded like a stage magician trying to hypnotize us all. Is it weird that I want to cluck like a chicken every time I hear the word "baby" now?