Go Susie! It's your Birthday!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUE!

O'Reilly Vs Moore

Bill O'Reilly of Fox News fame agreed to see Fahrenheit 9/11 and to do a one on one interview with Michael Moore.  Good stuff from both sides.   

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,127236,00.html 

 

Tax money used well??

I saw this and thought that the government had hit an all time low.  Report: Bigger breasts offered as perk to soldiers.  Now all soldiers and their families can have plastic surgery on the tax payers money.  How great!  Our country has reached an all time low. 

Babies All Around!

I want a hamburgular beanie baby from McDonalds for...er... my niece.  Right my niece!  And the Ronald McDonald one for my new nephew. 

 

Oh yeah, for those who don't know I have a new nephew:  James!

You Must Watch This!

Hilarious bit of political back and forth.
 
George Bush vs. John Kerry:  This Land
 

Where is the romance?

There is something that has been on my mind for a while so I thought that I would blog about it.  Why isn't slow dancing done in dance clubs anymore?  Not long ago it was still very popular.  I remember frequenting my favorite club at Michigan State University, Sparty's, until 2000 and they played 2-3 slow songs every hour or so.  When did slow dancing and romance become so uncool in today's society?  The clubs today that actually play music that is decent enough to dance to is full of empty, shallow, and slutty men and women.  They don't want to find a boyfriend/girlfriend, they just want to get laid.  Hell, the dancing these days is just dry humping.  I may be a hopeless romantic, but slow dancing is fun and it is a very romantic way to spend a night.  Now it seems that you have to be invited to a wedding in order to slow dance with your significant other.  Slow dancing also was a time to dance with someone you have wanted to meet during an evening and you could even talk to the person.  Talk to a person of the other sex at a club?  What is that?  The music is usually too loud that you cannot talk to anyone at the club.  Let's just face it, people don't go to dance clubs to find someone to date.  Dance clubs are just a glorified slave auction block to show off your goods to find someone to go home for one night so you can feel good about your self for a day or two.  The single girls that frequent dance clubs, ecspecially the ones that try too hard and barely wear anything, are the kind of girls that boys want to screw or maybe date for a short while but they rarely marry them.  Have you ever heard of a toast at a wedding reception where the best man said "I remember when Johnny met Carol at the dance club.  They freaked all night and it was love after the first time they had sex...".  Of course there are some men that just want a trophy wife and you can spot them when you meet their wives right away.  They are a fantasy.  Men usually date the girls that they can have conversations with and can enjoy life with.  All of the married people I know did not meet the one they married at a club.  A lot of them were introduced by mutual friends, met at school (Eric and I), or met at a club meeting or worked together.  Just an observation.  Who knows, there could be a few people that met this way and are blissfully happy.  I just think that this speaks to where our society is at.  Our children look up to movie stars and singers, not authors or firefighters.  We are obsessed with celebrities, big cars, electronics, and high fashion.  None of that means a damn thing if you do not have someone you love to share that with.  From some of my friends that I have talked to it is hard to date in this day and age but I hope that no one gives up because it is worth the wait!!  Single men and women, don't overlook the less than perfect looking people because you may have met that one person for you and lost them forever.  Don't think that just because a girl is chubby and shy that she is not good in bed.  They are the best and naughtiest in bed :)  Tee hee...........

I need a new cell phone

My loyal cell phone of 4 years is finally dying.  It just randomly turns itself off when I am not looking:(  Like this morning when I tried to call Sue.  I pressed the talk button and placed it to my hear.  When it did not ring I pulled it away only to see a blank screen.  Actually, I was sort of happy to see that.  I thought I was going crazy for a while there:)  I would swear that I had turned it on earlier in the day, but when I pulled it out of my pocket it would be dead...
 
So anyways I need a new cell-phone (no comment from you Uncle R that it is just a tool of my oppression.  I love my phone and am sad to see it go).    Anyone in the Huntsville/Madison area recommend a good company to use?  I have Sprint now, which works reasonably well in Huntsville, but does not work at my house.  Sue has Verizon, which works well for her everywhere except on UAH campus.  Ideally I need a phone that works at both.  Anyone have any advice?

Crystal Pepsi

Sue and I are watching I Love the 90s right now, and they are mocking Crystal Pepsi. Sue and I are both in agreement that Crystal Pepsi rocked. Thinking about it brought me back to the High School lunch room. Of course, since I FUCKING HATED HIGH SCHO... Sorry. I need to channel my anger into more constructive things. Like teaching my dog to BITE THE CROTCH OF EVERY ASS I WENT TO HIGH SCH... Wait, I'm doing it again. I really need to work on that...

I may need to order me some on eBay. Only $6.50 for a can of 10 year old Pepsi? I'm in.

Update: (11:42am) Holy crap! That can of Crystal Pepsi on eBay is up to $46!

Can you say "Ouch"?

Man Jailed for Shooting Off His Testicles

LONDON (Reuters) - A British man who accidentally shot himself in the testicles after drinking 15 pints of beer was jailed for five years on Tuesday for possessing an illegal firearm, a court spokesman said.

David Walker, 28, was arguing with a friend at a pub in South Yorkshire, northern
England, when he went home to get his sawed-off shotgun, which he jammed into his trousers. But as he walked back to the pub, the gun went off, blasting pellets into his testicles. Doctors later removed what remained of his testicles during emergency surgery.

Walker admitted possessing a prohibited weapon at a hearing in June at the court in Sheffield.

Now call me a softie, but isn't the fact that he blew his nuts off with a shotgun punishment enough?

F$ck Sh%t Bit#h

Has anyone else but me noticed that radio and TV censors have just gotten lazy lately? Its like all they do is bleep out one letter of the last syllable of the swear. Its just plain lazy!

<old man voice>Why, in my day they bleeped out the actual swear word, 2 words in front of it, and every third time they said "but" just to be safe!</old man voice>

Dubya attacks gay marriage again to get votes......

I went to my Alum's (Michigan State University) web site version of their newspaper and found a wonderful editorial about Dubya's newest attack on gay marriage. The editorial was so great that I thought I would just post it in full text. I agree with everything he writes:

'Defining' marriage silly, heterosexuals have damaged institution

The sanctity of marriage is in danger of forever being drowned in depravity and sin. Stop the presses. Terror alert elevated: code turquoise. Oh, the humanity.
This whole debacle mushroomed earlier this year, when those rascally gays actually spoke up and sought their right to have their unions recognized by the government. They wanted the same benefits straight couples enjoy, including recognition of parenthood in case one half of the union befell tragedy. They wanted to make sure the child wouldn't end up in a foster home rather than with the person who raised the child its whole life because of a skewed court system. Eew. Since when do they deserve rights?

To combat it, most recently in our dear mitten of a state, a petition has been circulated to put a legal definition of marriage - a man and a woman united by law - on the ballot in November. Dubya even stammered about having the constitution amended to define the institution as such.

It's a tremendous push to, as the claims state, protect the sanctity of marriage. Marriage. The union of two kindred spirits in the eyes of the law, both divine and human. A pledge between a man and a woman. A pledge for two to forever be committed to one another, now and forever. Amen - er, I forgot. Religious zealotry doesn't factor into this at all.

And now these gays want to destroy this sacred institution by pledging their love to the same sex. And they want their love and devotion recognized. Not in my back yard, ladies. A promise ring will have to do. Go love and devote somewhere else.

Aside from misperceived Biblical references, taken out of context and contradicted throughout, I have yet to hear a plausible argument for the eminent threat that gay marriage has on the sacred sacrament and institution. I've heard and read arguments claiming to be about the threat but were actually free speech issues about the barring of anti-gay statements by religious leaders. Not one person has legitimately given a reason why gay unions will irreparably devastate the institution of marriage as we know it. As if the union of two gay men will suddenly cause the core of the Earth to boil over, spilling lava on all us sinners as God watches, chuckling, from above.

Perhaps the absence of a proven threat is a direct result of we straight folk. After all, we've done more harm to the sacredness of marriage than we can possible imagine. That is not to say that there aren't sacred bonds existing in heterosexual marriage, but we heteros have more or less made a mockery of the institution that the staunch conservative segment of the population seems to see as a glittering ball of humanistic harmony, disrupted only by those gays and their icky love.

Marriage has become a joke. A weekend fling. Role models like Britney Spears can cruise out to Vegas, get married for a night and be done with it. Bada bing. It's a quick walk from the altar to the divorce lawyer's office. Divorce rates have skyrocketed. Prominent figures and folks in your community have been married and divorced several times over, some unions lasting years, some less than a month.

Yeah, I got your sanctity of marriage.

We have the most asinine reasons for marriage in the straight and conservative community. Premarital sex is a sin. Masturbation is inhuman. But dammit, there's an overload of testosterone in an 18-year-old's loins that just needs to be expelled. What's a horny lad to do? Marry little Peggy Sue. After an awkward honeymoon and some uncomfortable sex, the two live unhappily ever after, afraid to part and stuck together because they used the "sacred institution" of marriage to get their rocks off without angering the Lord (these are the same people, mind you, who still think Christ was a dirty-blond white dude with smooth skin and a post-Renaissance style of dress).

We have prenuptial agreements, which are more or less a guarantee that the marriage won't last. We have mail order brides who come to the states for a marriage, some emotionless consummation and a green card. We can be married by the high priest known as an Elvis impersonator.

Could it really be that straight folks have ruined the "sanctity of marriage" to the point that they fear that gay people might do a better job? Heteros have spent over 2000 years ruining marriage in its purest form. Maybe the real threat in the whole issue is the threat of pride. Maybe homosexuals could go on to make the symbolic union of those in love something sacred again.

Danger. Stop the presses. Terror alert elevated; code violet. Those gross, icky gays could actually make marriage an institution of love and devotion again. We'd best stop them before they destroy us all. Scary times.


Andy Kryza is the State News opinion editor. Reach him at kryzaand@msu.edu.

Mad Movie/Weekend Recap

Good weekend all in all. Friday night Sue and I headed downtown to a small hole in the wall bar called the Tavern with the Huntsville Party posse. Good bar actually. Good size drinks that actually come in a glass. Amber-bac and Guinness on tap. And the band was really good. Of course, I cannot for the life of me remember their name right now. Red...Something. They claimed to come from Ireland, but if they were the accent was REALLY weak. Great rock band either way. I got drunk enough to regret it the next day, but not drunk enough to regret it during the actual drinking (Sue might argue with that. She claims that I was dancing like the stereotypical white guy with Ann at one point. To which I reply, "I AM a white guy:)").

Saturday I was too hung over to go do any more drinking. Instead, Sue and I caught a showing of King Arthur. I thought this was one of the better movies I have seen this year. It was a lot like Braveheart, but shorter. Thank God BTW; I had to pee so bad by the end of the movie I actually used that little kid urinal because it was the closest one to the door:) Continuing the tradition started by Troy, this is yet another action/war movie with the underlying theme that either "there is no God", or "God does not help those that do not help themselves". Its more serious than I was expecting for a summer blockbuster, but that is most certainly a good thing. I really liked the acting, the casting, and Keira Knightley:)

Another funny quote...

I love this one. Shows a level of self-loathing that I just can't quite understand:)

"I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff."

Bush Vs. Edwards

Yahoo! News - Bush Raises Issue of Edwards' Experience to Be VP

I read this story with a real smirk. Bush (and his republican croonies) have been making comments that John Edwards does not have enough experience to run the country. A funnier way of looking at this is that the Republicans are more or less saying that George W Bush himself was not ready to be president, since he had roughly the same experience when he ran for office (6 years as governor of Texas vs 6 years in the US Senate).

Spider-Man 2 review

Warning: Spoilers ahead. If you haven't seen the movie, you may want to skip reading this blog entry. Don't say I did not warn you, cause this is your warning right here.

Lets just get the obvious stuff out of the way. First, I was not a big fan of the first Spider-Man movie. Quite frankly, I'm not certain why everyone was so googlely eyed over it. The CGI was not THAT good, and besides I am on record that CGI usually hurts a movie more than it helps (If I can tell it is CGI). Call me old fashion, but if I can tell it is CGI then the whole "suspension of disbelief" and "movie experience" goes right out the window. Make it seamless, or don't use it at all.

So now that I have that out of the way, I can talk about what I liked and did not like about this movie. On a scale of 1 - 10, with ten being the best movie ever, I would give this movie a 6. First off, the things I liked about the movie:

1) The fight scenes were much better in this movie. The CGI of Spider-Man and Doctor Octopus is fluid and dynamic. In keeping with the fact that Spider-Man is older and more comfortable with his powers now, he uses a good deal more of them while fighting. The train scene is particularly well done.

2) Alfred Molina ("Doctor Octopus") is excellent in this movie. He gets to play both a good guy and a bad guy, and his personal redemption at the end of the movie is very well acted. He is never over the top in my mind.

3) Stan Lee (creator of Spider-Man) gets to make a cameo.

Now the things I did not like:

1) The movie is slow. REALLY slow in spots, especially in the middle of the film.

2) Tobey Maguire just ain't Spider-Man. I'm not entirely sure why I don't like him as Spider-Man, but I just don't. I think it is the fact that he plays Peter Paker as such a whinny pussy. That is just not how I remember Spider-Man/Peter Parker as a kid. Not entirely his fault is the script, which is light on the usual quick quips that Spider-Man is famous for. This point alone probably accounts for most of the reason I gave the movie a lower score.

3) Couple of plot points that confused me during the movie and that afterwards just flat out made no sense. In the scene where Mary Jane asks Peter if he loves her, Doctor Octopus throws a car through the window of the restaurant right at Peter Parker. Any normal person would have been killed by that car, leaving the Doc with no way to find Spider-man. So why would he do that?

4) The grandmother's speech about "a hero in all of us" was sappy, cheesy, and REALLY boring.

Overall, I thought it was just alright. I was never blown away; I never had any empathy for a character in the movie.

I know Kung-Fu

Or at least, I know CSS/HTML-fu. As you can probably tell if you are viewing this website, I have been dorking around with the layout and style for the past few days. Changes are:

1) Switched to a cooler looking template. Of course, being the compulsive geek that I am I could not just be satisfied with the template as is, so I mucked with it for 4 or 5 days until it was just the way I wanted it. I apologize to anyone who got to see this site in the middle of one of the changes:) The thing that took me forever was getting the content column to be bigger. The original template specified an exact width of something like 540 pixels. That sucks when you use a wide-screen monitor with a resolution of 1280 pixels like I do. More than half the screen was being wasted! I feel like one of those infomericals late at night:

Announcer: "I've just got to show you this new product! Through the use of an incredibly large research budget (which was mostly spent doing shots of Jagermeister and teaching a one-legged monkey to dance for us), we are able to bring to you twice, THAT RIGHT, TWICE the content on the same screen!"

Sheep: "Oooooohh. Ahhhhhhhh..."

2) My posts now show up in blue. Sue's posts are in purple. Just so it is more obvious who is who.

3) Added a link to Steve's blog. Just cause he is cool.

4) Stats actually work now, and Sue's and I's profiles are now available to read in case you did not know who we are or you were just desperate to know if I have improved on my average number of posts per week ;).

5) Added the cute picture of Sue and I in front of Caesar's Palace. Sue claims she looks stoned in the picture. Let me be the first to clarify that the only drugs we were on at the time was some alcohol (pretty much the entire time in Vegas I had some alcohol in me) and whatever drugs have found there way into the water supply of Las Vegas (I would imagine more than you think).

News is Desensitizing

As I was driving back to work today, I heard some news blurb about the Lacy Peterson trial. As I am sitting at a red light thinking about the trial, the analytical part of my brain had the following thought:

Right Side of Brain: "Why is this trial getting so much attention? Its just a run of the mill murder case."

Right after I thought that, the other half of my brain immediately bitch slapped it in disgust.

Left Side of Brain: "Run of the mill"? What the f#$k is wrong with you brain? Murder should never be run of the mill.

I'm angry with my right side of my brain right now, so I stopped, got some ice cream, and ate it REALLY fast. Yeah that's right. I gave myself brain-freeze just to spite the right side of my brain! Luckily I am at work now, where the only part of my brain that I use are the automatic muscle contractions like breathing, blinking, and heart beats.